As hard as it is for us to watch our loved ones age and get to a point where they need help with day-to-day activities, it is much harder for that elder to have to give up their independence. How do you deal with a loved one who refuses your suggestion of elder care?
It’s important not to show anger, or get upset with your loved one if they resist the idea of elder care. Instead, try getting to the root of their concerns. Understanding and being respectful of their concerns, no matter how insignificant they seem, will help you proceed with your approach to elder care.
If your loved one says they are concerned about strangers coming into his or her home, get them involved in the search for a qualified caregiver and let them sit in on the interview process.
No one likes to feel helpless. The fear that accepting elder care is going to take away their independence causes many seniors to fight the idea of receiving help. Discussing the benefits of having a caregiver help out with some of the daily chores could help your loved one realize that this will allow them to have more time to do the things they enjoy.
Sharing your concerns can be helpful in getting your loved one to open up about the idea of receiving elder care. Letting them know you are worried about them, and stressed because of time restraints, and pressure to check in on them all frequently, could awaken them to idea that accepting help from a caregiver will place less of a burden on you.
If it seems like you are not getting through to your loved one, it is often helpful to get reinforcement from others close to him or her. Sometimes they are more willing to accept advice from other people they respect, such as a friend, a doctor, or member of the church.
One way to make the thought of having a caregiver seem less frightening is to refer to the caregiver as the housekeeper, or cook. Let them feel as if they are being pampered.
You may be in a situation where your loved one is refusing elder care, but you are forced to make a decision. If you are dealing with a loved one, or parent who suffers from altered thought processes, you may not have a choice but to be loving but firm in order to maintain their safety.
If you have a loved one who could benefit from elder care in Walnut Creek CA, contact the caregivers at Hillendale Home Care. We help seniors and their families with many levels of home care service. Call (925) 933-8181 for more information.
